“People are anxious to make and maintain friendships and the church has emerged as one of the few places left where they can do so. However, the potential for developing a network of church-based relationships is undermined by the lack of time people devote to church activities, their poor relational skills, and their disinterest in establishing a deeper commitment to the churches they attend.”
– George Barna, The Second Coming of the Church

“We miss out on life and meaning if we are not making relationships a priority on any given day.” – Michael Slaughter, in Momentum for Life, our study book for this sermon series. Today we are talking about what it means to invest in relationships.

We miss out on life if we are not making relationships a priority.

Life is not about success in business or about our own personal accomplishments. Life is about people. The greatest investment we will ever make in life will be in relationships, nothing else. Stuff can be replaced, people cannot.

It’s all about relationships. When asked what my God looks like, I answer quite simply, “My God is a relational God, who places people in my life to lead me, guide me, love me and offer faith modeling. My calling: to be the kind of relational person God wants me to be, so that I can lead others, guide others, love others and be a faith model to others.

I think we all agree that life is hard. You’re either experiencing a problem right now, or you’ve just cleared up a problem, or you’re getting ready to face a new problem … as a result, you’re discouraged, tired, drained, empty.

God never meant for you to go through life all by yourself, all alone, because we were created to be in relationship with one another. God has given us the church as a foundation for building relationships. Being a part of a community is not a solo act. It’s about giving and receiving, it’s about growing in faith and strength. It’s about support and encouragement.

Here at the SPUMC we hope to grow in faith and encouragement by creating more small groups, the best way that we know of to help people get connected in a community of faith. It’s all about relationships. You know, you can come to worship for an entire year and never really know anybody. That’s why small groups are so important.

Here at church we are working hard to create groups that offer support, encouragement, mission opportunities, accountability, fellowship and study. We know that some of you have gathered to read and study the Momentum for Life book. But if you haven’t connected yet with others, there’s still time. Even when we finish the series, you can still study the book! It’s a great little book with lots of potential for helping us find meaning in our lives.

We have asked you all to start your own small groups by finding a few friends who are willing to meet consistently for study and prayer. We figured it’s best to create small groups this way because then your group already has a certain level of trust and accountability.

If you haven’t yet connected to a group, but want to meet with other people, please see me, Scott or Ruth. We’d love to help you and help that process along and we strongly encourage it.

Some of you are thinking, “I don’t have time to be in a group.” Then that’s a problem. It’s all about relationships … we miss out on life and meaning if we are not making relationships a priority.

Some of you will say: “I don’t have time.” Others will say: “I’m not going to share my most personal intimate prayers, dreams, and problems. That’s too much of a risk.” That’s your choice … and yeah, you’re right, relationships are all about risk. There’s a person in our congregation who is currently part of a small group. His experience in his small group saved his life. I’m not exaggerating. Saved his life. Will that be everyone’s experience? I don’t know, but it’s worth a try.

You know, Jesus had a small group of men and women. They didn’t have “church” as we know it, but his small group was the place that held him and others accountable. It was a place where support and encouragement and care were offered. It was their life: that’s how they traveled, how they lived, how they shared, how they spread the Good News. We have to encourage Christian community, because we – your pastors – believe that strongly in the power of relationships.

Back to that time issue – “I just don’t have the time” … Everyone needs to make time to grow in faith and to build relationships. If we don’t prioritize how and with whom we spend our time, circumstances and other people will decide for us.

When we don’t make time to invest in relationships, we get into trouble. Not too long ago, I invested all of my time in my job. I allowed ministry to take priority over most everything else, including my family. The four most important relationships in my life suffered: my marriage and my children. In the midst of a great deal of pain and fear of losing the most important relationships in my life, I learned a very valuable lesson.

I learned it the hard way, when my marriage was failing and my kids were distant. I don’t ever want to do that again, because that didn’t bring much honor to my marriage, my children or to God. I learned that when I make time for relationships, I am honoring God.

Let me tell you what we do at my house, and by the way, we still struggle with priorities, but I feel as if we have goals and expectations. The dinner hour is sacred. It’s sacred for the Bresser family. We don’t answer the phone. So if you could please honor that with me, I sure would appreciate it.

We try not to let the outside pressures affect our meal time. Right now, it’s a bit challenging because we have to schedule dinner around basketball, play practice, Eva’s job and Brent’s school. Someone once told me, “When you have teenagers, you won’t be sitting around the table at the same time … it will be nearly impossible.” We do our best. When our oldest daughter came home from college for the first time, she couldn’t get to the table fast enough. And it wasn’t because of the food; it was because of the relationships. Find time in your family when you can build relationships. Find time to invest in relationships with people you care about, because you can never, ever re-live yesterday.

Today we are talking about investing in relationships. In the life of the church, we believe we can build relationships through small groups. In the lives we lead outside of church with family and friends and other communities where we connect, we believe it’s about making time, intentional time, to build relationships.

Michael Slaughter, in the book Momentum for Life talks about identifying our relational investments. He asks the questions: Who’s standing behind you? Who encouraged you? Who invested in your life that allows you to stand where you are standing today? Aren’t those great questions?

Mrs. McCool, my third-grade Sunday school teacher. Dennis and Ann Schwartz, my senior high youth leaders. Ken Petersen, my chemistry teacher. Mary Milks, my piano teacher. Don Collins and John Kautz, my campus pastors. My grandparents. My parents.

If we took a survey today of who it was that brought you into a relationship with Christ, the majority of you would choose someone from your childhood. This is exactly why we have church school, Sunday school, LOGOS, confirmation. This is exactly why we invite so many adults to be part of these ministries. Every child needs experiences with other faithful adults.

My son Henry was born and raised in this church. He has connected with lots of adults … he has lots of grandparents, aunts & uncles, brothers & sisters. Thank you for loving him and caring about him. He’s 4 yrs old and he’s quite clear about who stands behind him. Miss Angie, his Sunday school teacher. He may never remember a craft, or a song or a story, but he’ll always remember that he is loved … that he belongs. It’s all about relationships.

Who stands behind you?

More importantly, who are you standing behind? Who are you coaching, mentoring, teaching, leading, encouraging? Who is receiving the intentional time in your schedule for relationship building?

It’s all about relationships. May we be about the business of building God’s kingdom and investing in relationships in our living. Amen